The Life and Times of Pithy and Glib
In the beginning, Words ran deep with Thoughts and begat Conversation, the Great Matriarch in the house of Communication.
Conversation was hailed as a mother goddess whose presence could command Attention and influence Perception.
Conversation was most often met by Silence, who later became her lover.
Unlike Everyone-Else, Silence was never bothered by the fact that
He could never get a word in edgewise.
Conversation loved a good listener and he would hang on her every word.
Thus, the first child that was born was named Anticipation.
Conversation gave rise to every ounce of lust in Silence.
And even though Gossip told Rumors their love was doomed,
Their love was so consummated, so consuming, so all encompassing
That no one was surprised when the children kept coming.
Their second child was difficult, and thus named Objection, but he was quickly followed by Understanding and finally there came Agreement. Being an only child, Conversation loved being surrounded by syllables.
Objection and Agreement never strayed far from home.
But Understanding was often found missing
She liked to wander off with Tangent near the Point of No Return.
The next disappointment came with the birth of Conundrum
A dull child, Conundrum would often chase himself around in circles.
No one knew how to break through Conundrum’s behavioral problems
Until Clarity came along
She always had a way of shedding light on a situation.
This is where the mood shifts, after six children and a mid-life crisis, Silence had turned into an impenetrable wall.
Conversation got lonely and took up with Illusion.
When their affair was exposed by the pregnant pause that she took
Illusion was shattered and never recovered.
Truth stepped in and acted as midwife
Silence was never heard from again
Anticipation waited breathlessly
Understanding had fled
Conundrum began to spiral out of control
And Clarity was blinded by the light
It was a beginning of epic proportions
The birthing of Pithy and Glib, The silver tonged twins.
It was clear these two were special and Conversation spared no expense.
Culture was their first tutor, followed by Sophistication
But their favorite by far was Elocution, famous for The Dueling Double Entendre
In their teen years, Glib fell in with one of the Hypocrites.
Together they started a rock band called ‘Superficial Plausibility’.
They thought they had made it big when their first album
‘Sweeping Generalizations, a Cinderella Story’
was reviewed by the Obscure and Trite Times.
Unfortunately they lost their bragging rights
When they were accused of being an Anonymous Hoax.
Pithy, however, kept to her books and only once had a brief lesbian affair with Eloquence.
While short lived, the relationship was filled with so much meaning and depth
The tryst changed Pithy’s entire countenance.
Retrospect often said it was Eloquence that gave Pithy her sardonic and sententious style.
But perhaps it was Mysterious who taught Pithy the Mona Lisa Smile.
It’s rumored that Pithy experimented with LSD while studying Universal Law.
She found she had a knack for speaking in tongues.
In one of her trips she saw how Truth had been behind Illusion which made her a half-sister to Time.
But Time had been abandoned at birth, so he had no frame of reference
with which to understand Pithy’s musings of Predestined Probability.
He believed in Chaos Theory, and Anarchy was his mate.
Giving up on stringing disparate Thoughts into one coherent family,
Pithy set out to become an Oracle with Mysterious at her side.
Glib on the other hand, entered the public sphere.
He created his own political party known as the Ambiguans
Their logo was the two faced Janus, the God of double speak.
In his first debate, Glib was up against the titan known as Complex
It was media commentators who coined the term -
‘A Glib response to a Complex question’.
This became Glib’s motto and he got surprisingly far with it.
Winning election after election for his Ambiguous agenda
Glib made friends with the Bureaucrats and his name forever became
Synonymous with Politics.
In the end Pithy was seen as a sage.
She had many followers and was loved by all.
Books were written by and about her
‘Pithy Proverbs’ was a best seller
At her funeral, many celebrated as well as mourned for her life.
On her epitaph it reads: Pithy, not to be confused with Eloquence
Glib however lost everything.
He is currently presumed to have drowned in the Sea of Scandal, on the campaign trail until the bitter end.
His train got derailed while bridging the Gap of Thoughts.
Eyewitnesses report seeing Glib attempting to jump to the nearest conclusion.
But he miscalculated, lost his footing and fell.
All said they heard the splash when the tide was turning.
Glib was all washed up, but his body has never been found.